This week has, in a word, sucked. Worse than a vacuum cleaner on steroids. Worse than the snot-sucker I regularly torture the baby with. Worse than me throwing all the grammar rules out of the window and ending a sentence with a preposition. In the grand scheme of things/big picture/perspective, they are but minor annoyances. I know this. But still, it's my party and I want to pity. Myself that is. What is so bad about this week you may ask? Oh, just let me tell you.
1. I didn't get a job I applied for. Yes, I have a job and I should be be grateful/ecstatic/pooping rainbows that I have one and my family is not precariously teetering on the precipice of disaster. It doesn't change the fact that I hate my job with the passion of a thousand fiery suns. I hate the constant state of emergency, I hate how quality is always blamed for everything that goes wrong, I hate smelling like the inside of a garbage can at the end of the day. I've been with the company for almost 13 years and am no longer the young, ingenue-type employee that everyone wants on their team. I fear that I've been typecast and pigeon-holed as 'that plant person' and will never escape from this ninth circle of hell in which I spend my days tasting raw materials in failing products for the elusive off onion/garlic note and GODDAMN IT, THERE IS NO OFF ONION FLAVOR! But! the analytical work said there was so I must taste every. single. one. Of about 60 raw materials since GOD FORBID these people make a straightforward product. I also just might need a good cry. I'm not discounting that.
2. My laptop was infiltrated by a rogue computer virus that said there were myriad number of nasty viruses/spyware/etc. lurking on my machine. So I've been in utter fear of even booting up and almost in as much fear of the amount it will cost to make it safe and whole again. Hackers/thieves/assorted nasty persons: LEAVE MY COMPUTER ALONE!
3. Noelle actually does have strep throat. The rapid culture was negative but the 48 hour incubation came back positive. It happens, kids get sick but the timing forced her to miss a planned swimming date at our friends' pool, a trip to the zoo with Grandmom and Grandad, water play day at school, soccer day at school and, oh yes! The ENTIRE week of school. I love having to pay for her NOT to be there.
4. There was a massive morning thunderstorm today. Which was fine, whatever, I was locked in my little veal-hole of an office but! I left one of the car windows down about 2 inches. In a storm that I'm pretty certain rivaled the one that got the ark floating. The only bright side is that Noelle won't have to sit in her seat until Saturday at the earliest.
5. While shaving my legs in the shower this morning at 0-dark-thirty, I was A) half asleep and B) not really paying attention when I completely zoned out and nicked my butt. Because of course I did. So now I'm having to spend a large chunk of the day doing data analysis and data entry for the roughly eleventy-million raw materials which requires sitting. On the butt cheek with the slice. This? Is not comfortable.
So yeah, the pity party is in full swing round these parts. Pull up a stool and help yourself to the pretzels. I'll bring the beer.