Oh! Hey there. So, it's been a while since I've gone off on a work-related rant but after the past few weeks, I feel pretty entitled. Some of it may be boring and techno-y but it mostly boils down to people are stupid and woe is me.
It's been no secret that I'm not the biggest fan of my current position but earlier this year I found out that if I want to stay in Sensory (oh goody) then the head of the NQAL sensory group will be retiring in roughly 2 years and logically speaking, I'm the only one in house that has any responsibilities remotely close to what she does so I put my 2-year plan into action. Mostly this consisted of asking what I need to know and trying to schedule time with my boss to approve the trainings. (Spoiler alert: hasn't happened yet.) Okay, I can deal with two more years of this; things are supposed to improve, stuffs are being moved around, Bob's yer uncle. Then several weeks ago, a friend in the group that I left 10 years ago called me up to let me know she had gotten a new position and hers would be vacant and I should totally apply, she had already mentioned me to the lab manager. Wowzers! That's what I wanted more than anything, to go back there but always felt that too much time had passed. However, the way the job post was written, I qualified on all counts. Sweet! Eternal damnation of the sensory kind was demoted to Plan B. Sent in the bid, got the first interview, felt good about that, got the second interview, was feeling pretty good about that and then....Screech. Sorry. A two-grade jump is too much. We'd love to have you back but only at a lower grade and that's not what we're recruiting for but keep in touch. TTYL. Well fuck. Fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuck. Plan B has been called up to Plan A. Again. (It's okay, I'm still bummed but I've got my name back out there and that's half the battle blah blah blah.)
But! Knowing that's off the table right now (they'll rue the day!) meant that I could refocus on building the base of skills and training that I'll need to become Super Sensory Scientist - management of the shelf life report has found a new home with the materials management group (shockingly, where it should have resided all along), time freed up to really get the descriptive trainings going, still trying to get a meeting with my manager, we're making progress when...Blammo! The maelstrom of stupid has taken up residence in the plant and my office is ground zero.
First was several massive raw material rejections because appearance requirements such as 'Red' and 'Dark Red' were very confusing to our suppliers and I was backed on these rejections completely until the powers that be decided we really needed the material to make stuff and so, maybe our requirements need to be loosened to 'tan with a reddish tint' and 'orange is fine too'. I've stopped responding to emails and phone calls over this because they are on their own now if they want to use this stuff that doesn't meet the specifications that they specifically specified.
Next the person who is now taking on the responsibility of running and researching the shelf life report has just gone out for two weeks on paternity leave. (Interestingly, just last month my company started to grant 1 week of paternity leave. We still don't get actual maternity leave, you go on short term disability for that. While good on them for stepping into the 20th century for the guys, for the ladies who are actually HAVING THE BABIES, sorry, We award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul.) While on one hand, yay! babies!, this means that the report and research revert back to me while he is out because god forbid they have a backup to research materials in materials management along with a different report to block and test 174 products ASAP NBD. (Ha. Haaaaaaa. No.) and assorted evaluations, investigations, panels, and bullshit for the team of Me, Myself, and I.
But it's all good. I just sucked down a giant Diet Coke and I've got a magnum of Chardonnay plus unlimited ice cubes at home. I do apologize though to everyone on the primary ballot; Im'ma most likely take my annoyance out on y'all later. 'Murica! Fuck yeah!
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Friday, May 16, 2014
Friday sound off
No one wants to head into the weekend thinking surly thoughts with exasperated huffs of breath. So how better than to deal with them than to put them down and let them go?
1. All things politics.
Or more to the point, all things politics that include things like this.
And this.
See, I get it. You need your name out there for recognition. Voters need to know the players etc. etc. and so forth. But do you get what this means? It means although your giant ass signs increase your exposure, they also hamper my sightlines. Significantly. Merging into end of day traffic is hard enough but playing peek-a-boo and hide-and-seek around your signs with the rest of the rush hour crazies is the best way to get me NOT to vote for you. But thanks for letting me know who to send any repair bills to; at least I can ready your names clearly.
2. Doing doctor's notes wrong
There are times that we have to taste things at work that we'd rather not. I'd rather not taste anything with bananas or mushrooms but sometimes I have to. That's called being an adult and doing your job. We have one person here who has informed me that she can no longer taste seasonings or participate in panels because of hypertension. I would be more inclined to be understanding if along with this she had also given up smoking (nope) and modified her diet (Burger King anyone?) Don't tell me you can't taste because of the sodium in the seasonings when your lungs are as black as your soul and your diet resembles that of a frat boy. Your argument is invalid and we are all dumber for having heard it.
Okay, I got it off my chest. Now come on y'all, let's go make this weekend our bitch.
1. All things politics.
Or more to the point, all things politics that include things like this.
 |
| I now loathe the name Craig |
And this.
 |
| You can suck it, 'Cock'. |
See, I get it. You need your name out there for recognition. Voters need to know the players etc. etc. and so forth. But do you get what this means? It means although your giant ass signs increase your exposure, they also hamper my sightlines. Significantly. Merging into end of day traffic is hard enough but playing peek-a-boo and hide-and-seek around your signs with the rest of the rush hour crazies is the best way to get me NOT to vote for you. But thanks for letting me know who to send any repair bills to; at least I can ready your names clearly.
2. Doing doctor's notes wrong
There are times that we have to taste things at work that we'd rather not. I'd rather not taste anything with bananas or mushrooms but sometimes I have to. That's called being an adult and doing your job. We have one person here who has informed me that she can no longer taste seasonings or participate in panels because of hypertension. I would be more inclined to be understanding if along with this she had also given up smoking (nope) and modified her diet (Burger King anyone?) Don't tell me you can't taste because of the sodium in the seasonings when your lungs are as black as your soul and your diet resembles that of a frat boy. Your argument is invalid and we are all dumber for having heard it.
Okay, I got it off my chest. Now come on y'all, let's go make this weekend our bitch.
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Things that confuzzle me
You know, it's been a while since my last good rant. Not that this is good but I can't shake loose anything else in my head. Onward Ferb!
Self checkout at the grocery store. It's not rocket science: You pick up the item. You scan the item. You place the item on the belt. Repeat. Pay for the items. Pack the items. Leave. And yet I always seem to choose the line where the person at the front has a full cart and 5 items in manages to lock the system at a time where no help is around but you're committed to the line as the others are so much longer so you don't move but now the customers rocket like juggernauts through the flanking lines until finally, 15 minutes later, you finally scan your 3 items and go, half of your break time gone. *Poof* People, this is not the time to be brave. If it scares you, don't do it.
The Coworker's Wife. One of my coworkers received a new iPhone for Christmas from his wife in response to his son wanting one so she got them all one to use on a family plan because of course. Now his wife calls every day to...check in on him? Ask him to pick up the dry cleaning? Tell him they're out of meth? I'm not sure. At any rate, she always sounds pissed off. How do I know this? Because even after getting everyone and the dog an iPhone, she still calls the lab phone. Or the sensory phone. Sometimes both searching for him but never, EVER, the cell phone. In his pocket. That she gave him.
The local school system. Like pretty much everywhere else in the country, we got a crap-ton of snow this past winter. So much so that Noelle's school system used all 7 of their allotted snow days plus 2 more. (That's 9 for those playing along at home.) They made up one day by converting a professional/teacher development day into a regular instruction day. (8) The scheduled last day of school is June 17; this has been on the calendar since the beginning of the school year. Our district applied for - and received - a waiver for FOUR DAYS and an adjusted end of school year date of June 16. So: the total days allotted was 7. They went one over (see above advanced math). So obviously, you need to waive 4 extra days to end school one day early as clearly the kids need more time off.
The house. We are the second owners of our townhouse. A townhouse, by definition, is a small house attached to other small houses by common exterior walls. Our set was built at the same time (see: shared exterior walls) so it's quite befuddling the number of issues that we and we alone seem to have. It's almost like the builder played 'Eeny Meeny Miny Moe' to decide which unit would be the problem child. Woo Hoo! Lucky Sevens here. From the front door frame fairly rotting away to the the decorative door framing pulling away from the house to the shutters falling off the upstairs windows, this has been a long 10 years. (Then our tree just up and died last spring; don't even get me started on that.) But moving is not an option as that would require fixing these things which we can't do because, you know, money 'n shit, so we have to wait to fix these things all the while getting really nice notes from the HOA because PROPERTY VALUES (psst. It's a townhouse) so basically we're going to die in here unless I can figure out a way to steal my sister's house.
The cat. I love Jinx. Really, I do. What I don't love is getting the kids off to school late as it's the day coming back from Spring Break and finding not one, not two, but FOUR piles of cat puke on the 'new' carpet when we're already running late to lose another 15 minutes to blotting and spritzing and scrubbing to return home and find that the pet cleaner did absolute jack shit and now we have four puke pink areas on the carpet that I have treat AGAIN. On the bright side though, at least they match the walls.
Next time on 'Things that confuzzle me': Kids and plates - why they have such an antagonistic relationship.
Self checkout at the grocery store. It's not rocket science: You pick up the item. You scan the item. You place the item on the belt. Repeat. Pay for the items. Pack the items. Leave. And yet I always seem to choose the line where the person at the front has a full cart and 5 items in manages to lock the system at a time where no help is around but you're committed to the line as the others are so much longer so you don't move but now the customers rocket like juggernauts through the flanking lines until finally, 15 minutes later, you finally scan your 3 items and go, half of your break time gone. *Poof* People, this is not the time to be brave. If it scares you, don't do it.
The Coworker's Wife. One of my coworkers received a new iPhone for Christmas from his wife in response to his son wanting one so she got them all one to use on a family plan because of course. Now his wife calls every day to...check in on him? Ask him to pick up the dry cleaning? Tell him they're out of meth? I'm not sure. At any rate, she always sounds pissed off. How do I know this? Because even after getting everyone and the dog an iPhone, she still calls the lab phone. Or the sensory phone. Sometimes both searching for him but never, EVER, the cell phone. In his pocket. That she gave him.
The local school system. Like pretty much everywhere else in the country, we got a crap-ton of snow this past winter. So much so that Noelle's school system used all 7 of their allotted snow days plus 2 more. (That's 9 for those playing along at home.) They made up one day by converting a professional/teacher development day into a regular instruction day. (8) The scheduled last day of school is June 17; this has been on the calendar since the beginning of the school year. Our district applied for - and received - a waiver for FOUR DAYS and an adjusted end of school year date of June 16. So: the total days allotted was 7. They went one over (see above advanced math). So obviously, you need to waive 4 extra days to end school one day early as clearly the kids need more time off.
The house. We are the second owners of our townhouse. A townhouse, by definition, is a small house attached to other small houses by common exterior walls. Our set was built at the same time (see: shared exterior walls) so it's quite befuddling the number of issues that we and we alone seem to have. It's almost like the builder played 'Eeny Meeny Miny Moe' to decide which unit would be the problem child. Woo Hoo! Lucky Sevens here. From the front door frame fairly rotting away to the the decorative door framing pulling away from the house to the shutters falling off the upstairs windows, this has been a long 10 years. (Then our tree just up and died last spring; don't even get me started on that.) But moving is not an option as that would require fixing these things which we can't do because, you know, money 'n shit, so we have to wait to fix these things all the while getting really nice notes from the HOA because PROPERTY VALUES (psst. It's a townhouse) so basically we're going to die in here unless I can figure out a way to steal my sister's house.
The cat. I love Jinx. Really, I do. What I don't love is getting the kids off to school late as it's the day coming back from Spring Break and finding not one, not two, but FOUR piles of cat puke on the 'new' carpet when we're already running late to lose another 15 minutes to blotting and spritzing and scrubbing to return home and find that the pet cleaner did absolute jack shit and now we have four puke pink areas on the carpet that I have treat AGAIN. On the bright side though, at least they match the walls.
Next time on 'Things that confuzzle me': Kids and plates - why they have such an antagonistic relationship.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
An open letter of confuzzlement to Lifetouch photography
Dear Lifetouch,
Is it okay if I call you 'Life'? Great, thanks. Life, I've got some questions. You see, yesterday my daughter had her very first school picture done and last night she brought home an order form directing my to PUTS THE MONIES IN BAZKET in two days or it would self-destruct. Or something. The problem is, I don't know what it is I would be ordering as there was nothing enclosed to review. In photography parlance I'm pretty sure they are called 'proofs'. You might want to look into those.
Undoubtedly Life, you utilize digital photography because HAI 500 STUDENTS and whatnot so I logically concluded that one could visit your website to review the 'proofs' as surely you wouldn't require parents and guardians to purchase expensive photo packages sight unseen. It's a lovely website full of Rah Rah stuff but when I went to the link for K-11 school portraits, I was greeted with this:
"We're currently performing maintenance on our website. Please check back later."
Is it okay if I call you 'Life'? Great, thanks. Life, I've got some questions. You see, yesterday my daughter had her very first school picture done and last night she brought home an order form directing my to PUTS THE MONIES IN BAZKET in two days or it would self-destruct. Or something. The problem is, I don't know what it is I would be ordering as there was nothing enclosed to review. In photography parlance I'm pretty sure they are called 'proofs'. You might want to look into those.
Undoubtedly Life, you utilize digital photography because HAI 500 STUDENTS and whatnot so I logically concluded that one could visit your website to review the 'proofs' as surely you wouldn't require parents and guardians to purchase expensive photo packages sight unseen. It's a lovely website full of Rah Rah stuff but when I went to the link for K-11 school portraits, I was greeted with this:
"We're currently performing maintenance on our website. Please check back later."
The only page on the website that wasn't working. Curious, no? Not to be deterred, I next visited the 'Make Payments and Shop Products' page as surely there would be a way there to find what I needed. Alas, in order to pay or order more pictures, one first needs to set up an account with information that can only be transmitted via the supersekkrit code found...in the portrait package order. We seem to have come full circle. You see the problem here Life.
Now, I took the liberty of conducting a highly scientific poll of past and current marks users of your products via email, Twitter and facebook and the consensus was that this is an extremely effed up way of doing business. How many other times are you expected to pay for something without seeing what it is you are buying first? I'm no economist but this doesn't seem to be a very sound business model. Or maybe it is as research (well, Twitter) indicates you are the only game in town. One would think with the delightful website that that there would be a way to provide codes to students so parents could review pictures online prior to having to fork over a crap-ton of money for potentially questionable products. See again: digital photography, wonders of.
I can only assume that this is an (ongoing) oversight and you are working diligently to bring your company into the 21st century as the upcharge for basic and DELUXE!!! retouching is inane when YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE WHAT MIGHT NEED TO BE RETOUCHED IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Warmest regards,
momofnandn
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Random Tuesday Thoughts: With a side of 'Rants'
Since it's Tuesday, you know what that means! Even more randomness than usual around here. We've got a lot to cover so let's get right to it:
On kids really ARE watching you
Two Christmases ago we got Noelle a play kitchen with pots, pans, a blender, plates, spoons, etc. This past year we got her some new food to go with the kitchen. Six months later she is finally starting to play with it. Which entails putting certain select foods in a 'dutch oven', stirring them with a spoon and then force-feeding me, Dylan and Noah 'lunch' or sometimes 'dinner'. Force-feeding in terms of her grabbing our chins, yanking our mouths open and shoving the spoon in there. Except for Noah who is just starting to get the hang of this spoon-food connection so he willingly opens his mouth. And is very confused when there isn't anything on it but continues to open his mouth when he sees the spoon in the hope that someday something might appear on it. For the record, we have never modeled this behavior for her so I'm not entirely sure where she picked it up but it's funny. When she does it to Dyl that is. It's what she serves that makes me cringe: french fries, waffles, broccoli and a 'bowl of 'sketti'. Care to guess what we have for dinner in our house a lot? I think that I need expand our menu and FAST.
Suze Orman isn't the only one getting her financial house in order
Dyl and I are celebrating another accomplishment. We've paid off two credit cards completely and have made great inroads on the last one so we are planning to have everything paid off by the end of the year. This? Is awesome! I'm so proud of us! No snark, just a big ol' YAY US!
You take the good, you take the bad
Since last August when Noah was born, I've dropped 60 pounds. An entire grade-schooler. And yes, half of that was pregnancy weight but still, 30 pounds on top of all the baby weight. I'm pretty damn pleased with myself if I may be so bold. How could there possibly be any downside to this? Well, there is a downside though 'backside' might be more accurate. As in mine is disappearing into 'Flatassland'. When you are worried about your pants being literally on the ground at work, this is cause for concern. And let's be honest here, baggy pants do not look good on anyone. I'm looking at you MC Hammer! So, why don't I buy some new pants. That fit? Well I would but see above RE: CREDIT CARDS PAID OFF!
Secret, secret, I've got a secret
I've been harboring a secret celebrity crush for many years now on David Boreanz of 'Buffy' and 'Angel' (And also 'Bones' I guess but I don't watch that show )fame which has come to an abrupt crashing end For now, my dear, sweet, Angel has been revealed to be no better than, oh, Tiger Woods or Jesse James. Yes, he has been cheating on his wife of 9 years with many women apparently. One of them even linked to Woods. Seriously, what do these famous guys do? Get together in their Famous Manly Club and swap fame-whores phone numbers? Do they NOT THINK THAT THIS WILL GET OUT? Why for the love of all that is holy can they not just KEEP IT IN THEIR PANTS? Or not get married in the first place? I...am just done. With them all. Fie, a pox on you!
Hello Captain Obvious!
I've just noticed/discovered that the blogspot template does in fact have a spell check button. I'm going to pretend that this is a new and exciting thing so please do not ruin my carefully crafted illusion if it turns out that I'm just a raging idiot.
SQUEEE!
The hubs and I are going to the midnight showing of 'Iron Man 2' on Thursday. My MIL is taking the kids so WE HAZ A DATE.
And now for something completely different
I've been toying with the idea of a weekly column thingy dedicated to the glorious decade of excess known as the the 1980s. Also: the decade I grew up in. Good idea/bad idea/don't really care. I might do it, I might not. But *I* think that it would be fun. And embarrassing as oh yes, pictures will be shared. My hair. That is all that you need know right now.
That's it for Baltimore, Maryland, head on over to Keely the Unmom for even more random fixes!
On kids really ARE watching you
Two Christmases ago we got Noelle a play kitchen with pots, pans, a blender, plates, spoons, etc. This past year we got her some new food to go with the kitchen. Six months later she is finally starting to play with it. Which entails putting certain select foods in a 'dutch oven', stirring them with a spoon and then force-feeding me, Dylan and Noah 'lunch' or sometimes 'dinner'. Force-feeding in terms of her grabbing our chins, yanking our mouths open and shoving the spoon in there. Except for Noah who is just starting to get the hang of this spoon-food connection so he willingly opens his mouth. And is very confused when there isn't anything on it but continues to open his mouth when he sees the spoon in the hope that someday something might appear on it. For the record, we have never modeled this behavior for her so I'm not entirely sure where she picked it up but it's funny. When she does it to Dyl that is. It's what she serves that makes me cringe: french fries, waffles, broccoli and a 'bowl of 'sketti'. Care to guess what we have for dinner in our house a lot? I think that I need expand our menu and FAST.
Suze Orman isn't the only one getting her financial house in order
Dyl and I are celebrating another accomplishment. We've paid off two credit cards completely and have made great inroads on the last one so we are planning to have everything paid off by the end of the year. This? Is awesome! I'm so proud of us! No snark, just a big ol' YAY US!
You take the good, you take the bad
Since last August when Noah was born, I've dropped 60 pounds. An entire grade-schooler. And yes, half of that was pregnancy weight but still, 30 pounds on top of all the baby weight. I'm pretty damn pleased with myself if I may be so bold. How could there possibly be any downside to this? Well, there is a downside though 'backside' might be more accurate. As in mine is disappearing into 'Flatassland'. When you are worried about your pants being literally on the ground at work, this is cause for concern. And let's be honest here, baggy pants do not look good on anyone. I'm looking at you MC Hammer! So, why don't I buy some new pants. That fit? Well I would but see above RE: CREDIT CARDS PAID OFF!
Secret, secret, I've got a secret
I've been harboring a secret celebrity crush for many years now on David Boreanz of 'Buffy' and 'Angel' (And also 'Bones' I guess but I don't watch that show )fame which has come to an abrupt crashing end For now, my dear, sweet, Angel has been revealed to be no better than, oh, Tiger Woods or Jesse James. Yes, he has been cheating on his wife of 9 years with many women apparently. One of them even linked to Woods. Seriously, what do these famous guys do? Get together in their Famous Manly Club and swap fame-whores phone numbers? Do they NOT THINK THAT THIS WILL GET OUT? Why for the love of all that is holy can they not just KEEP IT IN THEIR PANTS? Or not get married in the first place? I...am just done. With them all. Fie, a pox on you!
Hello Captain Obvious!
I've just noticed/discovered that the blogspot template does in fact have a spell check button. I'm going to pretend that this is a new and exciting thing so please do not ruin my carefully crafted illusion if it turns out that I'm just a raging idiot.
SQUEEE!
The hubs and I are going to the midnight showing of 'Iron Man 2' on Thursday. My MIL is taking the kids so WE HAZ A DATE.
And now for something completely different
I've been toying with the idea of a weekly column thingy dedicated to the glorious decade of excess known as the the 1980s. Also: the decade I grew up in. Good idea/bad idea/don't really care. I might do it, I might not. But *I* think that it would be fun. And embarrassing as oh yes, pictures will be shared. My hair. That is all that you need know right now.
That's it for Baltimore, Maryland, head on over to Keely the Unmom for even more random fixes!
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