Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Defiance: Brothers in Arms

Previously on Defiance: Irisa tortured a creepy Castithan businessman then had regret-sex with Deputy Tommy while Nolan and Amanda re-enacted a Wild West hold-up gone horribly wrong.

A pudgy Castithan is being chased through the market by a steely-eyed tough guy. Cornered, he releases an energy blast from what appears to be a container of bubble solution. Diversion created, he tries to slink away  when Terry Tate, Office Linebacker Nolan flies through the air and tackles him causing Steely Tough to whine 'But that's MY bounty!' *Pouts* Steely Tough is none other than Buddy Eddie from the unit back in 'Nam. Nolan made the tackle so Nolan gets the prisoner; Eddie less than graciously agrees but demands booze and boobs in return. No worries Eddie, Nolan's got this.

Stitching the mad bomber up is Doc and our new friend Pol tries to recruit her to break him out of jail. Doc essentially rolls her eyes at him so off to Kenya's the bros go where of course they run into Irisa. Nolan should be really glad that Child Protection Services aren't around anymore. Eddie was there when Nolan rescued Irisa, natch, and Irisa glowers at 'Uncle' Eddie. Drink. Booze procured, Eddie starts looking for some boobs and eyes Kenya. Nolan is less than thrilled with this but hey, she's on the clock. Dolla dolla bills yo. Off they go upstairs when she 'remembers' that she already had another client scheduled but hey! I got you a consolation prize of a Six-Legged Monkey Crawl. To the surprise of no one, Eddie is more than okay with this.

Downstairs, Amanda and Kenya discuss Kenya's relationship with Nolan. Amanda basically says, 'Gurl, he's just that into you and you should go for it!' while Kenya looks doubtful. It appears she's regretting giving Nolan the rewards card.

Back at Lawkeeper Central, Irisa is sharpening her knife and glowering at the stone. Drink. Deputy Tommy comes in and tries to talk to her, inviting her over that night. Clearly he's looking for more than an one-afternoon stand but Irisa is not making any schnitzel for him. See kids, this is why work hookups are more trouble than they're worth. While having this heart to heart, someone drops a mysterious packet of flower food into Pol's cell and he asks for some salt and water. Tommy gets it for him and they leave...with Pol close behind after blowing up the cell.

In the Mayor's office, Amanda argues with Nolan over who has jurisdiction over Pol - them or Eddie. He's loyal to his friend but will back up his mayor. This may all be moot when Government Agent Suave guy comes in also wanting Pol and with apparent relationship baggage tied to Amanda. Amanda makes a deal for goods for Pol - which will be difficult to collect on since he's disappeared.

Former Mayor Nicki has not left town for the golf courses of Florida after all and accosts Quentin in the trailer diner working on the puzzle of the golden bearclaw. She attempts to sweet talk him, calling him the smart one and asking questions about the golden bearclaw as Hipster Glasses watches nearby. Quentin takes news of the conversation home to Rafe who tells him to throw the bearclaw down the mineshaft and melt it. If Nicky is interested in it then it can't be good and if Rafe is acting intelligently, then the end is nigh and we are all doomed.

Pol returns to the scene of the blast to reclaim his bag from where he stashed it at the haberdashery. It may be the post-apocalyptic world but damn it, we will have hats! The good man running the stall is compensated with a silver disc of doom that is not money but does kill him because clearly: werewolf. Or Pol is a sociopath. Could go either way at this point.

Pol tracks down the most ego-maniacal powerful Castithan he can find: Datak. In that all white house, if they close their eyes you could have a helluva game of 'Marco Polo'. Pol needs to get out of town and to do that, he needs Datak's assistance. Datak, who is only mostly a fool, does not want to undermine the life he has carved out - people are RESPECTING him, DAMMIT, but Pol appeals to his vanity. Surprisingly, Datak tells Pol to get out but look, Pol brought dinner that looks a lot like chicken cacciatore. Aw, how sweet. It tastes of home. Datak pulls a gun and tries to throw Pol out of the house when inexplicably his hand starts to shake. Pol twists his ring and Datak falls to the floor in abject pain. The stew, it was booby-trapped! Really, Pol? You are a hotshot weapons person and you develop a ring to give a person gastrointestinal distress? I can do that too; it's called ordering Chinese take out.

Quentin is trying to be a good son and dispose of the golden bearclaw when Luke's shot appears and tells him not to do it. So he doesn't. Sigh. None of the McCawley's are very bright apparently.

Eddie and Nolan trace pol to Datak's because hello Castithan profiling. Datak is nice and helpful but they don't find Pol. Pol asks Datak to get him over the boundary out of Defiance - to the Boss Hogg mobile! But because this is opposite day, the Dukes give chase in the post-apocalyptic General Lee. Nolan is increasingly suspicious of Eddie but the bromance is strong and chooses not to listen to, oh, I don't know, EVERYBODY.

Hipster Glasses has broken into the McCawley's house looking for the Golden Bearclaw. Quentin comes home helpfully holding the bearclaw and they struggle; Quentin is tased. HG takes the bearclaw but while he's admiring his prize, Q wakes up and egged on by Ghost Luke, chokes HG to death. Luke gives Q a paranormal high five because if you don't listen to the ghost of your older brother who made very questionable life choices, you get your teenager card revoked.

Nolan and Eddie overtake Pol and Datak because everyone knows that the General Lee can outrun Boss Hogg's POS. Irisa and Tommy take Datak back to Defiance but not before leaving Eddie w/ another glower. Drink. There's a 3-way bitchfest with Pol whining/bragging how everyone wants him for his weapony ways; Eddie wants Pol for the bounty money, Nolan wants Pol back in jail. Nolan goes all 'I'm taking my ball and going home' and takes care of the issue by killing Pol. Eddie goes nutso that Pol was his meal ticket, he has no money, nothing to live for talkycakes. Eddie pulls a gun on Nolan to make HIM the bounty because of Irisa. Unbelievably Nolan talks his way out of this mess then proceeds to give Eddie a get out of jail free pass in return for telling the collective that Irisa is dead to keep her safe and Eddie pulls a gun on him. Nolan ends up on the wrong side of the gun a lot for a Lawkeeper. Marshal Mysterious arrives and is apoplectic that Pol is dead. Eddie takes the blame and is thrown into the unmarked rover but has the packet of mysterious powder and asks for water and salt. That's it; everyone in the future is going to be forced to retake Science 101.

Nolan goes back to find Kenya who shockingly enough did not take Amanda's advice and dumps him for not being her type. I thought that anyone with a dick would be her type but whatever. Does this mean Nolan has to pay her now?

Quentin is back in the mines throwing HG down the mineshaft as Ghost Luke cheers him on.  Ghost Luke is kind of an ass. You know, Quentin's pretty handy in a crisis. I think that I want him on my team. He has one last chance to dispose of the golden bearclaw forever but alas, cannot bear to part with his precious. He does however, sneer at the hipster glasses before tossing them into the shaft of despair. What have we learned today? Hipsters meet with grizzly ends. You heard it here first kids.

The showdown between Eddie and Nolan was a bit anticlimactic but I loved how Nolan went Indiana Jones on Pol's ass proving he's not entirely useless.

Next week: Will Amanda make a play for Nolan? Can Irisa not glower at someone? And who is Stahma confessing to?

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